


Hell Is A Place On Earth Without You

by lightwoody



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, Crying, Edom Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Sad Alec Lightwood, Sad Ending, edom, i wish i could say im sorry but i Am Not, it truly makes the experience more painful, listen to the acoustic version of war of hearts while u read this, this is the malec edom angst that no one asked for but i wrote anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 09:16:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12980916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightwoody/pseuds/lightwoody
Summary: The day that Alec Lightwood lost everything.





	Hell Is A Place On Earth Without You

**Author's Note:**

> so its been a while ! but i am coming back as strong and as angsty as ever ! i listened to the acoustic version of war of hearts while i wrote this and it actually ruined my life,,,,anyways ! happy reading ! ;)))))

Magnus’ magic crackled in his palm as he whisked away their dishes into the sink at home, and Alec’s heart warmed as he thought of the word.

_Home_. He had moved in with Magnus officially about a month ago and it had been the best month of his life. Being able to fall asleep next to Magnus, in awe of how beautiful he was, even when he slept, and wake up next to him every morning, shower together when they were both running late, and curl up on the sofa together to watch the cheesiest romantic comedies until the early hours of the morning; it was like a dream he hoped he never woke up from. Alec smiled to himself, thinking about how only a few months ago he was so sure he would never get to have what he wanted, that he would never be able to fall in love. And then he met Magnus....a ray of light after a lifetime of darkness.

“What are you so smiley about?” Magnus asked, walking up to Alec and smoothing down the lapels of his jacket. His touch was gentle and full of love, and Alec’s heart skipped a beat.

“You,” Alec whispered, placing his hands on the sides of Magnus’ face and nuzzling their noses together softly. His entire body was buzzing as if he had just had one too many glasses of champagne. By the Angel, just being near Magnus made him a whole different person. After all of the years of halfhearted smiles and forced laughter, he was finally, genuinely, happy. “I love you so much, Magnus. Gods, I love you.”

Magnus laughed, confusion in his eyes. “I love you too, angel. What’s this about?” He laced his fingers into the hair at the nape of Alec’s neck and Alec shivered at the feeling, closing his eyes.

Alec sighed, his thumb brushing Magnus’ brow. “I’m just so happy that whatever gods exist brought us together. I thank Raziel every day for you. You’re my heart, Magnus.” He didn’t know why he felt such an intense wave of love for Magnus all of the sudden, but it was making his throat close up and his breathing uneven.

Magnus’ mouth was open slightly and his eyes were glistening in the soft light of Alec’s office. “Alexander, I-“ his voice caught in his throat and he surged forward, catching Alec’s lips with his and tugging on Alec’s hair.

Alec melted at the sudden affection, running his hands down Magnus’ arms and gripping them tightly when Magnus’ tongue ran across the seam of his lips. Every time Magnus kissed him he saw fireworks exploding behind his eyelids and heard waves crashing inside his head. It was passionate and intense and unlike anything Alec had ever felt before. Magnus pressed his body against Alec’s completely, and Alec moaned, stumbling backwards a bit before regaining his balance and (regretfully) pulling away from Magnus.

“I think we need to stop before we get too carried away,” Alec breathed, his heart beating as if he had just run an entire marathon.

“Mmmmm, but I was just getting started my darling, Alexander,” Seeming to have abandoned any seriousness from before, Magnus pouted, running a painted nail down the side of Alec’s face.

Alec closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, willing himself not to break under Magnus’ teasing. “I enjoy my job as the head of the Institute, and, no matter how in love with you I am,” Magnus beamed at that and Alec truly believed it was the cutest thing he had ever seen, “I would not enjoy being fired for indecency in the workplace.”

“I guess it’ll just have to wait until tonight,” Magnus sighed. “I do have a bit more work to attend to at home. A client has requested that I brew them a potion that will make them more attractive. Perhaps I should brew a bit extra and offer it to your parabatai? He’s been looking quite tired lately.”

Alec rolled his eyes, but chuckled softly. Magnus and Jace’s relationship was often....tumultuous. “Very funny, Magnus,” Alec quipped as Magnus snapped his fingers to open himself a portal home. “Text me when you’re home, just so I know you’re safe?”

“Your concern for my safety is admirable, dear,” Magnus said, his eyes sparkling as he placed a gentle hand against Alec’s cheek. “Never fear, Alexander, I’ll send a text your way as soon as I’m back at the loft. And as soon as I take off all of my clothes. Would you prefer an ‘I have returned home safe’ selfie or an ‘I’ll be waiting for you’ booty pic?”

Alec’s face flushed, his entire body felt like it was overheating, and the sly glint in Magnus’ eyes was definitely not helping. “Magnus, I’m at work,” Alec stressed, and Magnus silently raised his brows, waiting. “....The second one.”

“Mmmm, that’s what I thought,” Magnus purred, giving Alec a chaste parting kiss before pulling away to step through the portal. “I’ll see you at home, my heart. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Alec smiled as Magnus disappeared into the portal and it closed behind him.

Alec returned to his desk, his mood already beginning to decline as he stared at the mountain of paperwork in front of him. He thought of Magnus, though, waiting for him at home, and dove headfirst into his work.

* * *

Alec had been messily scrawling on a form about a demon raid they had performed last week when looked up from his work, and at the clock, sure that only about an hour had passed. His jaw dropped when he saw that the clock read one in the morning.

Magnus hadn’t texted him, but that was unusual. It must have slipped his mind as he delved into brewing his potion. That was one thing Alec loved about Magnus. He was as invested in his work as Alec was, so he was never even the slightest bit angry when Alec lost track of time or had to take a rain check on the occasional date to finish up some work.

Alec stood up and stretched his stiff arms above his head. His heart raced when he remembered that Magnus might still be up and they could finally finish what _he_ had started so many hours ago.

It was when Alec made a move to grab his phone and keys from his desk that he felt the gust of wind that he had become familiar with a portal opening blew a few papers off of his desk. He looked to his right and expected to see Magnus’ fiery blue magic waiting to bring him home, but instead he was met with the violet purple light and Catarina Loss, holding the portal open with a grim expression on her face. She looked like she had just finished a shift at the hospital. Her long, brown hair was held back with a thick headband, and she was still wearing her dark blue scrubs.

“Cat?” Alec asked curiously. “What are you doing here? Is everything okay?”

“Alec,” she said softly, “I think you need to come with me.”

Alec felt a sense of dread gnawing at his insides. He knew the expression that Cat wore, as he had also worn this expression. Countless times when lives were lost in the field, when he had to tell a warrior’s family that their loved one had been killed on a mission, he used that expression as a mask to hide the fact that he knew that it could happen to him, that he could lose someone he loved more than life, at any given time. And now, it seems, he had.

Alec dropped his things instantly, darting from his desk and into the portal as quick as he could. He was enveloped by the cold nothingness of the portal and he couldn’t help but think that this is what his life would feel like, constantly, without Magnus in it.

He emerged from the portal only a second later, with Catarina to his right. They were standing in the threshold of the loft, and Alec’s breath hitched when he took in the sight in front of him.

The entire place was in disarray. The shelves had been overturned, and their contents were spread across the room haphazardly, torn to pieces. Magnus’ sculptures and paintings were ripped to shreds and his expensive alcohol and glassware had been shattered. Everything was _ruined_.

Dot, who had apparently been with Catarina to pay Magnus a visit, was kneeling on the floor, examining some of the broken possessions.

Cat walked over to her, speaking in a hushed voice, leaving Alec in the doorway as his entire world crashed down around him.

Alec’s vision was blurring as he stared at the mess around him, and his throat began to close. “What-what happened?” Alec choked, leaning against the wall next to him, unsure he could support himself.

Dot stood up from where she had been kneeling, rubbing her fingers together and examining what looked like an unusually red shade of dirt. “There was someone here,” she informed him, still staring at her hand. “I found a footprint, way too big to belong to Magnus, and whoever it was tracked this dirt all over the place.” All of the sudden her eyes widened and she brought a hand to her mouth, covering it in shock.

“Dorothea?” Catarina exclaimed, taking a step forward in concern. “What is it?”

Dot lowered her hand from her face and finally looked up, making eye contact with Alec. Her eyes...they were _terrified_.

Alec’s breathing became quick and labored and he began to feel nauseous. His mouth felt dry and he could barely get the words past his lips without choking up. “Dot, _please_.”

Dot’s eyes shone with unshed tears, and her hand, covered in red dirt, shook. “The dirt,” she whispered, “it’s not just any kind of dirt. It’s from, oh god, it’s from _Edom_.”

This word meant nothing to Alec. He knew that Edom was another word for the Demon Realms, and that that’s where demons spawned after they were killed. But what did that have to do with Magnus?

“By Lillith,” Catarina breathed, her mouth opening in shock. She wiped a shaky hand over her eyes and sighed, seeming to have aged a hundred years in less than ten seconds. “We have to inform the Clave, Dot. Immediately.”

Dot nodded and snapped her fingers, opening a portal that lifted her hair off of her shoulders. She and Catarina stepped towards it, seeming to forget about Alec completely.

“Wait,” Alec gasped, running his hands through his hair, tugging on it harshly. “Edom? What does that mean?”

The two women shared a look, and Alec could tell that in that moment they were pitying him. Alec hated being pitied.

“For god’s sake, _someone_ tell me where the hell my boyfriend is!” Alec yelled, slamming his fist on the wall behind him so forcefully that the drywall cracked under his hand.

Catarina purses her lips and then spoke. “As you may already be aware, Magnus’ father, Asmodeus, is one of the nine Princes of Hell. The Princes of Hell reside in Edom; it’s basically their kingdom. One can’t just portal there whenever they like, it’s practically it’s own dimension of the universe. Few know how to travel between there and our dimension. And whatever happened here, whatever fight took place, it seems that Magnus lost. They probably ambushed him as soon as he got through the door.”

At this, Alec groaned out loud, bile rising in his throat.

_Text me when you’re home, just so I know you’re safe?_

Alec had brushed Magnus’ silence off as if it _didn’t matter_ , as if it weren’t the _one_ thing that could’ve saved Magnus’ life.

“It’s plausible that Asmodeus has some need for Magnus, whether it be within the confines of Edom or here or whatever other Hell dimension he desires, so he sent a mercenary to retrieve his son.”

“No no no no no no, this can’t be happening,” Alec dig his fingernails into his palm as agony ripped through his entire body. It felt as if someone was peeling his skin off his body and setting his bones on fire. “We have to-“ Alec choked on his own breath, hot tears slipping down his cheeks.

“There is nothing we can do for now, Alec, except inform the Clave that a mercenary from Edom was on our soil, and that the High Warlock has been taken,” Catarina said softly. “We’ll be back as soon as possible. It’s late, try and get some rest.”

They both stepped through Dot’s portal and it closed behind them, leaving Alec alone in a deathly silence.

Alec lunged for the books on the floor, sure that there had to be a solution, something that would tell him how to get to Edom.

He opened multiple books,rifling through the sizzled pages for something, anything, that would help him save his boyfriend.

“Please, please, please, please, please,” Alec chanted, tossing aside worthless book after worthless book, his entire body shaking violently.

He finally got to the last book on the floor, and screamed in frustration when he found that it was only a silly romance novel from the 1800s. Alec stood up harshly ripping the book in two and throwing it across the room.

“There’s gotta be,“ Alec gasped, his chest feeling as if it were being crushed by a thousand pound weight “ _Something_ -“ a sob finally escaped his throat and his legs gave out beneath him. He landed on the floor, his legs folded underneath him, and his arms wrapped around his torso, as if to protect himself from the tidal wave of pain crashing over him.

“ _Magnus_ ,” Alec pleaded to the empty apartment, “come back, please, come back. I’ll do anything, I swear it. I’ll let you put nail polish on me, like you love. I’ll go with you to that restaurant in Rome that you said has the best pasta carbonara you’ve ever tasted. I’ll go dancing with you in Times Square, even if I don’t know how to dance, Magnus, oh god, _please_.”

Alec said all this as if it would somehow bring Magnus back, and the deafening silence that followed seemed to last an eternity.

Alec leaned back on the balls of his feet and brought his knees to his chest, burying his hands deep into his hair. He cursed himself for believing that everything was fine and that he and Magnus could finally live together peacefully. He had jinxed their relationship by believing that they could be happy together and now Magnus was _gone_ , and there was nothing Alec could do to bring him back. Alec’s body ached with despair, and he felt the loss of Magnus all the way to the very core of his soul. Alec’s everything, his love, his dreams, his heart, had been ripped so violently from his hands, and he was absolutely helpless to get it back.

Alec laughed bitterly at the irony. Magnus was the one who had been kidnapped and taken to Edom, but as for Alec?

He felt as if _he_ were the one in Hell.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on tumblr @lightwoody and on twitter @highwarlockk for more of my antics !!!!!!!!!!! i would love if u would leave a comment or a kudos <33333


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